Attn: Customer Service

Complaint Form

Product Type:  Muse

Model No.: Eternal

Last Serviced:   Sometime in the 70’s

Complaint:  Busted Dimmer Switch

Brief Description of Problems:  Only turns completely off or completely on.  There is no in between.  Also, the product has developed a sense of twisted humor, finding this malfunctioning switch hilarious and entertaining.  Currently, it is stuck in the ‘ON’ position on ‘High’ and I hear a lot of snarky laughter through the din of character voices.  And a blender.  I think she’s making margaritas to celebrate the cleverness of her plot to try to fry my brain.  I’d also like to/: Brief means brief:/

Suggested Repairs:  ADD or REPAIR dimmer switch.  REMOVE unwarranted sarcastic personality of product – or – SEND ME A NEW ONE!

Signed:  Harassed Writer   (000) 555-HELP / imnotlaughing@controlurmuse.com

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