What Have I Done?!

Today, I got hit with the biggest truckload of anxiety I’ve felt thus far when it comes to my book, The Zen Lounge.  2014 is literally right around the corner, which means my copy editor is going to be sitting down sometime soon with my book and reading it!  What if it’s not as spectacular as I thought it was?  What if the publisher regrets giving my voice a chance?  My family and friends are telling me that I’m being unreasonable.  That it wouldn’t have even passed the initial submission if it wasn’t worth something – but to this I say – “Have you seen some of the stuff they publish these days?”

Okay, maybe I’m just being a nervous ninny, but I can’t help it.  Even if they still like it, I’m also nervous about what they’re inevitably going to want to change, take completely out or add.  Maybe the adding wouldn’t be so bad.  I mean, I still have the original draft that was over 3,000 words too long for submission.  Adding would be easy!  I just dread the pain that’s going to come from a complete hacking.  Ugh!  I fear plagiarism – while unintentional – it could still be in there!  I tried very hard to avoid it.  We always try hard to avoid the worst things you could do as a writer, but I think those things are like sugar ants; they always find a way in!

On top of that, I think I’ve got a few lectures coming to me real soon.  I may have taken advantage of the fact that the Instigator’s been abroad and maybe I haven’t been editing the way I should.  Oops.  My bad.  What snickering?  That wasn’t me!  I would never… (^_^)

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