Red Means Get (H)er Done!

Lights-C7lantern-red_lgHere’s a completely off the wall and somewhat inappropriate (therefore, funny to me) post to break up the monotony.  I find myself wondering just how in the world we ever decided that Red should mean ‘Stop’ and Green ‘Go,’ when for centuries – and in all parts of the world – the red lights glaring outside of certain, nocturnal homes have indicated “It’s go time, boys!”

I’m talking about the Red Light Districts, of course, where prostitution and other adult activity is prevalent within a city.  Sometimes legal and regulated, sometimes not.  Urban legend tells us that the ‘red lights’ originated as lamps railroad workers (or coal miners, depending on which version you’re hearing) would take with them when visiting the local brothel, so they could be easily located in a time of emergency.  I read this has been discarded as an unfounded, unreliable old wives tale.

A more disturbing claim explains how the glow from red lights located within the actual rooms where these ancient and still taboo transactions took place, would help camouflage the sores on a prostitute’s skin from whatever STD she had.  Wow! Talk about false advertisement!

Why am I pondering this at all, you ask?  Why would someone who writes plotted porn for a hopefully-soon-to-be living concern herself with something as commonplace as prostitution?  Well, I’m not, really.  However, I do drive by a particular house every day that always has a blatant red light shining above their front door.  It’s larger than a pen light, smaller than a normal light bulb and bright as hell.  Now, the reality is that it’s most likely akin to the lights on the dash of a sports car.  A deterrent and/or indicator that the house is armed and ready to start screaming at the top of its lungs if you try to enter it without a key.

But, I’m me, and I can totally picture the homeowners getting a good, twisted chuckle out of the idea while installing it.  Maybe it’s an innocent oversight, and they’re actually clueless about the original meaning for a red light outside the entrance to their house?  Or maybe… they’re hosting the best farkin’ parties in town!


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