I’ve never been one to hold grudges. First of all, I’d have to be absolutely perfect to hold a grudge for anything minor. My conscience would have to be free and clear of any mistakes I’d ever made close to the same caliber as the offender. Mostly it just seems like a total waste of energy. I think it takes more effort to remain angry at someone than to just let it go and honestly, keeping the person who wronged you the center of your world by focusing on that grudge seems awfully counterproductive.
The best revenge is a life well-lived
Perhaps, I’m just too lazy for the whole snubbing thing, I don’t know. What I do know, is that I’ve seen lifelong friendships destroyed over grudges that, in my opinion, were a lot like trying someone for murder when all they’d done was steal a candy bar. Especially, when the person wronged was far from innocent of their share of guilty behavior. The only thing involved in a grudge is pride and we all know there’s a fine line between being a little proud and cutting your nose off to spite your face. Things quickly escalate into a giant pissing contest, neither side willing to back down, because no matter what started the problem, it has evolved into a matter of principle. At least, that is what we tell ourselves to justify our less than dignified behavior.
I try to tell my children that it takes more strength to walk away, than to fight. Of course, parents have been telling their children that for centuries and it takes a lot of hard life lessons to finally figure it out. Most importantly, I’m trying to teach my kids how best to choose their friends, how to stand up for themselves, and how to completely remove themselves from less than favorable relationships.
I may not hold a grudge, but I will cut all ties to someone who’s wronged me either significantly once, or as a repeated offense.
Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, Sayōnara!