Twisted Sense of Humor

The Daily asks: You return home to discover a huge flower bouquet waiting for you, no card attached. Who is it from — and why did they send it to you?


I don’t know anyone who would actually buy me flowers without proudly announcing they did it in a card, so this would actually creep me out.  That, in turn, would draw up a long list of suspects, because while no one in my immediate circle would buy me flowers just because… they sure in hell would buy me flowers just to creep me out.

Let’s see, my first BFF would buy me something I could plant, if flowers were in order (otherwise, I’d just get a box of rocks). It would be something telling, though, so I would know it was her.  Like Snapdragons, Azaleas or Calla Lillies… maybe Irises if she was feeling particularly sassy.  She wouldn’t go 24 hours without asking me about them, though, thus revealing herself.  (p.s.: BFF#1 is horrible at keeping secrets, even her own.)

BFF#2: The bouquet would be wildly designed and I’m about 110% positive it would incorporate something entirely inappropriate, like plastic male anatomy parts or miniature Vodka bottles, most likely both.  One thing for certain, it would loudly declare who bought them, so there would be no secret about it.

My sister wouldn’t buy me flowers, she’d leave a note asking when we can go flower shopping for her garden again.  Oh, and btw, I borrowed several of your movies while I was here… 🙂 But I love you seester.

All of my parents (yes, all as in several sets) would leave a card.  My brothers are still in denial that floral shops even exist and so, I think, about the only 2 gentlemen in my life that would have the thought and joy of surprising me with flowers would be the 2 I’m raising.  But it would have to be my birthday or some other significant holiday to garner that kind of attention from teen boys.

*Sigh* I guess it’s a good thing I’ve never put much stock in getting flowers…  hence the creepy aspect of it all.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s